Portrait of Junior Year.

It's crazy to think that I'm so close to graduating.  I've been taking college courses since I was 14 and now it's starting to wind down.  Have I learned enough in my time here?  Have I taken advantage of every opportunity that was given me?  It's a little scary to think that in such a short amount of time I will be 'on my own' and expected to just run with it.

I'll hardly be underprepared.  Temple (read: Dr. Trayes) has been bootcamp for photojournalists.  I'm exhausted.  I hardly sleep.  I don't go out.  But my photography has improved, as has my ability to get the shot no matter what, to tell the story, to accomplish what I thought was impossible.  I've learned a lot about what I'm capable of.

I'm grateful for the experience.  I'm glad to know that I can work hard and achieve something difficult.  But I know that this isn't what I want for my life.  I love photography, I love the people I photograph, I love getting the story.  And there was a time when I would thrive off of the adrenaline.  These days, I dream about settling into a little home in the mountains with my husband and family and opening a cafe.  I dream about photographing my kids as they grow and learn things.  I want to document pregnancy and birth - I want to pursue the things I  care about.  I am worn out - I don't care about breaking news the way I do about family.


I'm homesick for something I've never known.  I'm longing for a place I've never really been.  I'm proud to know that I can work as hard as I have... but all I want is for life to slow down.